Exton

As Raina is coming up the stairs she hears Stoney sing. She pauses at the top, leaning against the wall and stops to listen. As she pays attention to the words, the expression on her face starts change and her color goes ashen. Nick has noticed from across the bar, her sudden stillness is unnerving and the haunted look in her eyes is something he hasnt seen. Something else was very, very wrong. And then to his surprise...tears gathering, that Raina is trying desperately to keep from falling.

The song reminds her of her sister. Her sister that looks so much like Alise its almost uncanny. Tara had been younger Raina thought, and her hair darker, but the eyes were so similar. Alises were almost violet in color, her sisters had been darker but still....the same kindness, the same thinking that everyone had some good in them.

I must be losing my mind. They cannot be the same.... is this my punishment, seeing Tara in other people? Tara is dead, has been dead because I couldnt save her. I should have saved Alise. I should have stayed by her. Its my fault she is gone now... and if she dies that will be my fault too. Stoney looks like the walking dead... I should find Jean-Marc and trade myself for Alise, would that be punishment enough for my failures?..

Raina glances over at Nick. The concern she sees on his face is more than she can take right now. As the tears start to fall, Raina runs out of the tavern and into the night....

Nick finds her a few minutes later in the alley, sitting on her haunches, face down on her knees, arms wrapped around her head, sobbing. The only words he can make out are I'm sorry, over and over. And then "I wasnt strong enough, I couldnt save her, I tried so hard, but I couldnt save her. I almost died and it still wasnt enough...” Nek lifts her head and tries to wipe the tears away. He has never seen such naked desperate regret and sorrow, deep abiding sorrow, on anyones face and this is hard to take, even for him. “Come here, baby” and he lifts her easily and carries her across the street to a park. “We need someplace quiet for awhile.” He finds a childrens park, a slide with a large platform connecting it to other parts of the structure and takes Raina there. Effortlessly jumping with her and setting her down close to him. He just holds her, gazing at the stars and moon above, wondering what the hell would have affected her to this extent.

Raina finally gains some semblance of self control and tries to wipe her eyes. Looking up at the stars with Nick she sees a falling star as it arcs across the sky, tail bright and shining. “My father told us that warriors in Vahalla would look down on us at times and when they make a crack in the heavens to peek through sometimes a star falls out.” Raina sighs, “I miss my father.” She looks at Nick, “I didnt want to do this to you, bring up things from the past that no one can change anyway. But I guess I owe you some kind of explanation. Alise looks and acts just like my little sister, its the strangest thing. And then when I heard Stoney singing that song...I dont know, it all came rushing back at me.”

She shakes her head and wipes her cheeks again, “Tara was my little sister, the youngest in the family. We had different mothers and different paths in life but we were very close to one another. I think her mother was from Greece, Tara had long wavy hair, the darkest blue eyes I have ever seen. And she was so sweet natured, always smiling, always seeing the good in everything and everyone. The whole family loved her dearly, my father especially. She was his baby after all... She was training with a wise woman in the village to be a healer. And she would have been very good at it. There were several young men that wanted to marry her but my father said no, even though she was old enough I think he wanted to keep her by his side as long as he could.

She would watch me practice with my brothers and take care of me when I took a beating and then later when I was stronger she had to take care of them”, this brings a sad smile to Rainas face. She didnt like it when we fought, but that is the way of the Viking. She never understood it I guess. She hated it when the boys were rowdy, hated the noise of the swords and the yelling.

One evening, it was later in the winter when darkness comes early, my older brothers and I had been out practicing, which had quickly turned into a fight over something, something so petty I dont even recall what it was any longer. We were still yelling and arguing when we spilled into the longhouse for supper. Several of the women tried to silence us to no avail. Father was angry with us, more for not listening than the noise, but he slammed his fist on the table and roared for silence. This scared my sister so badly she ran out of the house. No one was very surprised, this was a normal reaction for her. But this late in the winter the wolves are hungry and venture close to the settlements. So I told my father I would get her.

It hadnt started snowing yet and I thought I would see her right away. As it was her footprints were easy to see in the moonlight and led towards the woods. And it was so cold, much colder than it ever gets here. I kept thinking she knew better, the woods at night, hungry wolves, surely she would not have gone that direction, But she did, and by the time I had found her so had the wolves. She was still alive, and I killed three of them but then the biggest wolf I had ever seen came at us. Black and foaming at the mouth, skinny, but still the most powerful one I had ever encountered, and hunger making it twice as dangerous. I killed it eventually, but not before it had bitten me in several places. She was crying, kept apologizing, but was so weak from blood loss. We managed to find a hunters shelter, barely stocked, but it was shelter from the storm. It snowed for four days and nights. I tried to take care of her, I did everything she told me I should. I ignored my own wounds and tried to hide them from her so that she wouldnt worry. Right up to the end she was.... more concerned.”..Rainas voice breaks at this point and the words come slowly and quietly “was more concerned about me than herself. By the time the weather broke and we were found, she was dead and I was nearly so. I did everything I could and it was not enough. My father was never the same, and rarely spoke to anyone after we were found. It took a year for my body to heal. I dont think my spirit ever has nor ever will....”

Raina took a deep breath, “You are the only one I have spoken to of this. It was my fault and so it is my burden to bear.” She holds out her forearms, “the runes are for protection, they work separately or together. The stars are for my sister, so I never forget. I assumed the responsibility by offering to go get her and I failed. And of all these tats there are no wolves and there never will be.” Nicholas isnt sure what to say and watches as two tears makes their way down Rainas cheek..