Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Victor walks our potential employee to my office, then nods and retires without a word.
Tannr is dressed simply but neatly in stonewashed jeans and a white button-down shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, showing thickly muscled forearms.
"Come on in, make yourself comfortable." I suit the action to the word, sitting in a dark wine-colored leather armchair. He looks around before sitting in a smaller chair with an end table at his elbow. His eyes are quick and precise, taking in the office, the furnishings and me in one flick.
I give him a small smile. "I'm glad you came. I'm going to have a few fairly standard questions and then I'll entertain any questions you might have - specifics about the job and so on. Your name is Tannr?"
"That's right."
"Unusual name - Scandinavian, if I'm not mistaken." He nods, his eyes giving nothing away. "Have you done security work before?"
"Not as such. I've been in the military much of my adult life, and I learned most of what I know there."
"Ah. I was a soldier myself once, a long time ago. What made you decide to leave the service?"
"That's kind of a long story." His eyes are somewhat apologetic. "I learned that I still had family living and I wanted to spend time with them, since I'd missed out on so much of that over the years."
"Commendable. Family is important to you, then. Are you married, have a girlfriend?" I smile again. "Any little Tannrs running around?"
He smiles for the first time. "I do have a girlfriend, yes. No kids… we haven't been together long and we want to be sure before we make a commitment."
"Very wise. Does your girlfriend know of this job offer? What does she think of it?"
He smiles wider, and much of the tension in the room seems to break. "Yes, she knows, and she's okay with it, provided I don't - errrr - sample the merchandise."
I give a short bark of laughter. "Well, I'll leave that between you and your girlfriend. Here at the Club we have no rules against employee fraternization - provided it occurs during your off-hours, of course."
"I don't think there'll be any fraternization beyond what's necessary to do the job."
"Well… be that as it may, I have a few more questions and then it's your turn." I lift my eyes to meet his, lock them there. "Let me ask you - and please answer honestly - what are your opinions regarding same-sex interaction?"
He shrugs. "I don't think much about it. It's not for me, but I know some people who are bi and we get along fine."
"And what about transgendered people?"
"Again, not my thing, but if it works for you, more power to you."
"Can you work with people who are gay, bi or transgendered and treat no one any different than anyone else?"
Another shrug. "Well, so long as I'm not expected to sleep with them, it's all good."
"Excellent. I think we'll get along well, young Tannr. Just a few more questions and I'm done. How well do you deal with pain?"
He looks up, surprised.
"Well?"
"Sorry, you caught me by surprise. Errrr - well, I don't like pain, but as a soldier, I've had to deal with it, so I can take whatever someone else dishes out."
"Good answer. There's a reason I asked that, which I'll explain if I offer you the job… and frankly, if things don't change in the next few minutes, I expect to."
"Cool."
"Last question… at least, I hope so. I get as tired of asking questions as you do of answering them… can you work with people who aren't precisely… errr… human?"
He doesn't blink, doesn't change expression, just nods.
"Sure, no problem."
No questions? This is a singularly incurious young man….
"Do you have any questions for me, then? If the job pleases you as well as your answers have pleased me, the job is yours."
"Well, I guess I want to know exactly what the job entails…."
"Largely, you'd be something like a bouncer - most of the time. If someone's drunk or stoned or abusive, you escort him out with as little fuss as possible. While the job can entail violence - and you'd need to be prepared for that - we like to keep things calm around here, at least as much as we can. At the same time, you protect yourself - and our other employees - first, and the customer is secondary." I shrug. "We hope it never happens, but if you have to kill someone, do it, and let me worry about the headaches later."
"That's comforting. What was that question about the pain all about?"
"Let me show you…." I unbutton my shirt cuff, roll the sleeve all the way up to the shoulder. All my shirts have sleeves that are slightly bloused near the wrist, so there's room for that and more. Tannr watches as the brand is exposed… the mark of the Order to which I once belonged.
"That's not a tattoo."
"Indeed not. It's a brand, the same brand worn by every employee here at the Club… some more obvious than others."
"This isn't some kind of 'property' thing, is it? Because I didn't think you were that kind of guy."
"And you're quite correct. This brand - which these days is applied with an electrical device, and with a local anaesthetic to dull the pain - is why your job is easier than it might be. Bear with me, this will take a while.
Once this brand is applied - we give you pain pills, by the way, enough to last a few days - you will have a psychic link with every other employee in the Club." I hold up a hand to forestall questions. "That doesn't mean anyone will be able to read your mind, or you theirs. At most, you might get a whiff of strong emotions, like anger or fear.
Let's say you're on duty and there's trouble. The Club has a lot of rooms; how do you know where to go? This brand is the answer. When trouble starts, it'll start to heat up, and the longer you wait to see what's going on, the hotter it'll get. It's roughly directional, too; the closer you get to the source of the trouble, the more it will cool down. It's like having a GPS dialed to 'trouble' in your skin." I grin. "I can assure you, you won't be able to ignore it."
"Okay… I hate to ask this, but this isn't exactly a legal business you have here. What happens if I get into trouble because I work here?"
"Well, first of all, it's not likely to happen. Several city councilmen are among our regular clients, along with the chief of police. Still… so long as you get in trouble only for doing your job, and nothing more illegal, the Club will cover your legal fees. Providing, of course that you were acting in the interests of the Club when you committed your… indiscretion, shall we say? Does than answer your question?"
"Yeah, I think so."
"There's no 'uniform' as such… we ask you to dress in such a way as to draw as little attention as possible to yourself, but the decision is largely up to you. After all, we want the ladies to be the center of attention here…."
"No problem."
He launches into the usual litany of questions then - salary, benefits, hours, and so on - and when we're done, the NiteOwl Club has a new employee….
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